Nuclear Ducks

It’s about the nuclear duck thingy… Was rejected but I liked it…

Mr Netanyahu: Ladies and Gentlemen, if it looks like a duck, walks like a duck, and quacks like a duck, then what is it?

Lady: A communist?

Gentleman: A terrorist?

Lady: Is it a nuclear weapon developed by Iran?

Mr Netanyahu: Close, but not exactly what I was getting at.

Gentleman: Oh, is this a riddle? My first is in ocean but not in sea? My second is… And so on. What am I?

Lady: Yes, like, I was trapped in a jail cell and all I had was a mirror and a wooden table. How did I escape?

Gentleman: Was the door locked?

Lady: Well, yes, otherwise I wouldn’t have been trapped.

Gentleman: OK, of course.  Let me think… perhaps this is more of a riddle that you need to have read out to you.

Lady: Yes, exactly right.

Gentleman: So, I looked in the mirror and saw… what I saw. I took the saw and did the only thing I could do with it, which was cut the table in half.

Lady: Yes, go on.

Gentleman: And two halves make a whole. So, I escaped through the hole.

(Cheering in the background)

Lady: Well done!

Mr Netanyahu: (cutting in over the cheering) No, no, no it’s not a riddle or a trick question.

Gentleman: Give us a clue then.

Mr Netanyahu: Well, it goes… quack, quack, quack.

Gentleman: Oh, it’s Daffy Duck!

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